Apple CEO Tim Cook comes out, and I wish there wasn’t such a fuss

Steve Jobs Memorial Russia

The Steve Jobs erection in Russia, that was pulled down after Tim Cook announced he was gay. I think the woman is trying to call the bloke trapped inside it? Or maybe Tinder in Russia is only on one phone?

Apple CEO Tim Cook recently came out to explain why he’s proud to be gay, and I personally have a mammoth problem with it.

Every time I read an article on the subject, glance at a headline, or see his smiling face on the news I cringe.

It’s not just because new Apple products seem to be getting less like actual upgrades and more like flatter, bigger and slower versions of their predecessors, or that my own technology, “Strawberry” has failed to take off. It’s a far superior fruit to an apple, and although my products so far are very limited edition iPhones with cracked screens that I’ve dipped in red paint, sales are still at zero.

This is completely confounding to me. For the last three weeks I’ve been listening to self-help seminars.  I’ve got the confidence and belief that they repeatedly tell me is all I need, and I’ve yet to see any success. I’m beginning to believe it’s all a big lie.

Much like all the press around Tim Cook being gay.

Consider this.

Nobody ever comes out and claims to be proud to be straight.

Nor do they claim pride in being a straight, white, middle-class male.

Well some people do, but they’re morons or Tony Abbott or Andrew Bolt.

Andrew Bolt

This is Andrew Bolt. He looks so creepy. That’s because he’s a creep. Every time I worry about the lack of evidence, thought or logic in my own opinion pieces, I read one of his and feel like a genius. He makes a lot more money from this than I do, however. Sad face.

This group is not a minority. They are not victimised, belittled, marginalised or harassed. If you are part of this group, and you think that you are, get over yourself. Life can be hard, but it’s still generally easier for you than everyone else.

Every other group has to face prejudice, and we may like to think that we’re a progressive society, but this whole thing proves that we are so not.

Tim Cook is standing up and doing amazing things for homosexuals everywhere.

It just really pisses me off that he has to do this…and that it is so necessary for him to do this.

Gay marriage is still not allowed in Australia. On a global scale, we’re a disgrace. Whatever your arguments against it, check back with me in a few years when it’s legal, and you’ll see that your arguments have been condemned to the junk heap of history’s stupidities along with climate change deniers and anyone who thinks The Big Bang Theory is funny. (TBBT is to humour what McDonald’s is to food. As in, it’s just not.)

First Gay Wedding Show In Paris

Same-sex marriage. Still not allowed in Australia. Shame on us.

The problem is not just with homosexuality either; the same goes for race, culture, people with disabilities, other sexualities – the list of those marginalised by society is endless.

If you’re wondering how to identify where there’s a problem, it’s pretty easy.

Along with someone being “proud” to be something, the person is required to explain their preference.

“You’re gay and a CEO? Why is that?”

“You’re a woman and a policeman. What’s that like?”

“You’re in a wheelchair and you work at a bank. How does that work?”

“You’re an aboriginal lawyer. Don’t see that every day.”

“You’re a woman in politics. That’s rare.”

“You’re a comedian? What do you do for money?”

Louie C.K.

I dream that one day they’ll say this about me.

Okay, so maybe there is some point in asking that last one, however, I wish there wasn’t.

With those other questions though, and every other similar query, it’s only when we stop asking and start accepting that we’re getting close to being the society we should be.

Good on you, Tim Cook.

Shame on you, rest of the world.

(Including me…)

Double shame on the Russians too for pulling down the memorial to Steve Jobs after Cook came out…

This article first appeared on The Big Smoke:


Xavier Toby is a writer and comedian

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