September 2013

Fifteen Reasons that Footy (AFL) is Awesome! That you might not have known or never noticed.

1)    There is only one Grand Final. As apposed to other sports where every round of the finals series involves it’s own mini series. Or sports where there’s no finals series at all. Which is a bigger downer than the political career of Alexander Downer, a cold pie or the Melbourne Football Club. 2)    So Read More

20 Reasons the Grand Final is Better Than Everything

Most of Australia will come to a stop this Saturday for the AFL Grand Final. The rest of Australia will drop everything next Saturday for the NRL Grand Final, and nearly all of Australia will stop on both Saturdays because in Australia, there’s nothing more important than a Grand Final. So here are twenty reasons Read More

More AFL Grand Final Tickets for Club Members Right Now!

This week there’s actually something worth lining up for – AFL Grand Final tickets. Last week there was that new iPhone rubbish. If you lined up for that, you need to buy a new mirror. Then go home and have a good hard look at yourself. Because there’s something very wrong with you. You know Read More

I’m Not Racist, But…

Here’s one quick way to work out if someone’s racist. If they say, ‘I’m not racist, but…’ Then they’re definitely racist. Really, that phrase should be outlawed. If it actually worked, nobody would ever again be sent to prison. In court all they’d have to say is, ‘I’m not a murderer, but… I accidentally mistook my husband Read More

What’s the Real Difference Between Liberal and Labor?

Forget the policies, what’s the real difference between Liberal and Labor? Here it is: Vote Liberal if you’re selfish. Vote Labor if you want to waste money. Vote Liberal if you have no hope for society. Vote Labor if you have hope, and can cope with disappointment. Vote Liberal if you think stuff everyone else, Read More

Just smile will ya?

For the sake of humanity, can everyone just please be a bit nicer to each other? It started at 9am. My flight arrived in Sydney, and my laptop bag was trapped in an overhead compartment two rows behind me. I politely asked three different people to get it down for me. Two ignored me and Read More