February 2013

Posted on February 19, 2013 by Xavier Toby

Hey mate, would you like a drink?

So I’m not drinking for February. Since the start of February I’ve been offered alcohol 237 times, but who’s counting? Not me, I made that up. It actually feels like far more than that. If I were counting the amount of times I’ve thought about alcohol, well I’d need thousands of fingers and toes to Read More

Posted on February 12, 2013 by Xavier Toby

Penguins on a Plane

So, penguins. It’s actually true that there’s more genetic difference between different colonies of penguins that live next to each other in Antarctica, than there is across the whole human race. People usually use monkeys in this example, tribes of monkeys in the Amazon, but there are already lots of jokes about that. Some of Read More

Posted on February 8, 2013 by Xavier Toby

My First Ever Comedy Gig Without Alcohol. What a #$!% Stupid Idea!

It happened last night. On Thursday, February 7, 2013. After four years and around four hundred shows, I finally did it. Save your congratulations, because my first ever full hour comedy performance without alcohol wasn’t worth celebrating, but it wasn’t a disaster either. It certainly would’ve gone better if I’d had a drink, or seven. Read More

Posted on February 6, 2013 by Xavier Toby

Telstra Helpline Receives Zero Calls

Following the most extreme flooding on record in Bundaberg and surrounding areas, Telstra internet and phone services to Central Queensland were knocked out for three days. ‘It obviously wasn’t Anthony Mundine. He couldn’t knock out anything,’ said a Telstra spokesman. The disruption was caused after the main communication tower for the region, located in Rockhampton, Read More

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